What I’ve Been Up To Lately

A couple of times each year, I post about what I’ve been doing. Maybe social media has trained me to flirt with TMI-mode, but I think it’s because when I work with my clients, I learn so much about what goes on their world that giving people a glimpse into mine feels right.

My New Office

649 Remington Street in Fort Collins, ColoradoI love, love, love my new office! Virginia Wolff is whispering in my ear that it’s okay to want a room of one’s own. Okay, maybe she’s not, but somehow I’ve given myself permission to embrace this space.

I swoon over the character of the house, a stalwart brick two-story home that has a formal name “Golding-Dwyre,” which I promptly Googled and came up short. Despite its elusive history, finding it remains one of my highlights of 2017. Right now, my little office is sparsely furnished, but I have plans to add a few things in the coming months.

A Sad Loss

My black lab, romping through the open space.My 14-year-old Lab died in September. Her health had been declining over the past year, so we had hints that she was nearing the end of her life. That didn’t make it easy, but we did get to say goodbye to her and be with her at the end.

Her full name: Darla, the Love Slut. I adopted her as a 5-month-old puppy, and when I met her, I felt such a strong connection to her that I convinced my reluctant husband that getting a puppy when we had a toddler and a kindergartener was a brilliant plan (and it certainly was!). It was only after we’d had her for a few months that I realized she had the magnetic, you’re-the-most-amazing-person-in-the-WORLD!!! energy for almost everyone she met. She was a special being, and she spread love far and wide.

Best Winter Vacation Ever

Glenwood Canyon, from the train windowMy mom and sis flew out from the east coast to visit just after the calendar turned to 2018, and we took the train from Denver to Glenwood Springs, six hours of scenic splendor. There are canyons that the train passes through that cannot be seen any other way (unless you’re an elite kayaker, and even then, some spots are still inaccessible) – pristine wilderness that took my breath away. And at the end of the train ride, there were soaks in some awesome hot springs, a quaint hotel that makes everyone feel like they stepped into a time machine, and a town where it’s fashionable to wear your bathrobe out and about.

Wading into Online Course Development

I spent a massive amount of time in December developing a course that’s tentatively titled, “Get Your Job Search Mojo Back: For Job Seekers Who are 50+.” It’s been a massive undertaking with >25 lessons inside 8 modules. I’m just doggone proud of myself. It’s a whole new world for me, and I’m almost done! It’ll be ready to release soon (I hope!)

My Content Consumption

Two of my friends and me
With two of my heart friends at Brene Brown’s talk in Portland.

I’m a bit of an audio junkie, so here are some audiobooks and podcasts that I’ve adored in the past few months. Here’s what’s absorbing me recently:

Thanks for reading my headlines and indulging me in my TMI flirtation.

Resources for Introverts

Stack of books with tea cupLet’s face it – I immerse myself in study. I can’t help it. Life-long learner here. And I’ve been absorbed in learning about introversion for several years. Since I keep my finger on the pulse of introversion, I thought it would be useful to share some of the people I respect and even revere. None of these links are affiliate links. I just like and admire these people.

Books

Websites

  • Quiet Revolution
    Susan Cain’s website, which she created in the aftermath of her book’s success. Sections on work, personal relationships, and parenting.
  • Introvert Dear
    A blog that focuses on introversion and HSPs (highly sensitive people)

Podcasts

I’m realizing that almost everyone on this list is a woman. Where are the introverted men? I think it’s tough for men to self-identify as introverts in a public way, but it’s so important. That’s why I want to point you to Jonathan Fields’ Good Life Project. He interviews people about their journeys, often to remarkable professions, and he speaks frequently about his own introversion on the podcast during soulful, deep conversations.

Social Media*

*Most of the people on this list post across multiple social media platforms – I’m just mentioning the ones where I enjoy them the most. Find them in the spots where you tend to be online.

Connect with me on socia, too. I post both my own articles and posts and articles from writers and other introverts that I find along my own journey.

  • Hang out with me on my Facebook page where I post career and introvert-related articles and reflections. I also have a small closed Facebook group where I post things that are more conversational than on my FB business page. Ask to join the group, and I’ll approve you.
  • Find me on Instagram, although mostly I post pictures of my foster kittens and the river behind my house (I’m a homebody – not much travel from me).
  • I’m an open networker on LinkedIn, so send me an invitation to connect there.
  • Twitter is probably the platform that I use the least, but I have a profile there.

A recent Insta post from Glennon Doyle that I adore (I shared this far and wide when I first saw it, so it’s a taste of the types of things that capture my interest):

You Don’t Have to Answer Your Phone

Introverts: here’s your permission slip.

You are hereby excused from answering your phone.

Decide when you want to answer your own phone.Even when you’re in a job search, there’s no need to respond to that ring tone (unless it’s a scheduled job interview).

Let callers leave a message. Then you get to deliberate about what you want to say and call back with your carefully phrased response.

I hate answering my phone, and I hear from countless clients who cringe at the idea of sliding their fingers across their phones to accept a call. “Ignore” sounds like a rude option, but it’s totally cool to respond on your terms. You’ll be composed and present and in a spot where you have great reception.

Take Your Time to Compose and Engage

A hallmark of introversion is taking time to compose and engage, and hitting the “pause” button in a conversation is absolutely legitimate.

You’re not alone if you glare disgustedly at your phone when it rings. It’s a clear sign that you’re in this tribe.

Show up in ways that matter. Let your calls go to voice mail when it makes sense and it contributes to your well-being, and then later, respond on your terms in ways that preserve the connection and honor the purpose behind each call.

Some places you might put your attention:

  • Make sure your outgoing message is clear and represents you well. If you have the default message with just your number, it doesn’t let the caller know that they’ve reached the right party.
  • Respond in a timely manner so that you encourage the communication if that’s your agenda.
  • Allow yourself to have additional time for deliberation if something unexpected comes up in a call when you’re live with someone. “Let me think about that and get back to you,” is one of my mantras, and if the caller is offering me something that I don’t want to block (a job offer, for example), I check to make sure my suggested timing suits the caller: “Will Tuesday morning be soon enough to get a response to you?”

No need to squelch your introverted wiring at every turn. Route your phone calls to voice mail when it makes sense and release any guilt that you were holding onto about that practice.